Circuitous
by peregrinepandora
Summary: Oneshot. It’s their First Kiss, amid steaming sauces and the thick smell of onions and the heaviness of impending fall. Amid UsThen and UsNow, when UsAlways is without definition in the usual circuitousness of Us. The cycle begins for the very last tim


Circuitous

* * *

"So," Sirius says, stirring a smoking saucepan, "Ask me what I did today."

Remus turns, pulling moodily on his tie. He eyes Sirius with care, dumping a cutting board full of diced tomatoes into the pan. "You used the Floo to peep into the Knockturn Alley brothels."

Sirius' mouth drops open, and for a moment, Remus is frightened he's gone too far. The distinction between Sirius-Now and Sirius-Then is tangible, but uncannily unclear, and like Sirius-Always, the only predictable thing about him is unpredictability.

"Monsieur Moony, you cut to the quick!" Sirius says, his twinkling eyes mock-aghast.

Remus' next breath is palpable relief. He sighs a laugh, his chest a little lighter. "What did you do today?"

"Well, I'm rather loath to tell you now—"

"Sirius!"

He shakes out his mane of dark hair and responds very quickly, "ate cake in my bathrobe."

Remus smirks at him and turns his back again, going at it with the onions.

"While you lot spend your days saving the Wizarding world."

"Are we really going to have this—"

"Never mind it, Remus," Sirius holds his hand up.

Remus turns and grabs it. "You're no good to any of us in Azkaban," he says gravely. "Least of all, me."

Sirius looks terribly sad for a moment, and then terribly confused. "I wouldn't—not to _you_, Moony—" and he tips his chin just barely up—_when did he get taller than me?_—and catches the other man's lips.

It's their First Kiss, amid steaming sauces and the thick smell of onions and the heaviness of impending fall. Amid Us-Then and Us-Now, when Us-Always is without definition in the usual circuitousness of Us. Sometimes the cycle lasts months, sometimes years. Once only days. The flirting, the fucking, and then the leaving. They've done it so many times that they've proven the cycle infallible, or at the very least self-fulfilling.

It's more than the heat of their mouths together, more than the lusting grasp of hands and robes, clutching and shifting, leaning, holding together. Shivering, pressing hard. One of them cries out, but the sound is lost in the other's mouth and in the fluidity between them.

Remus tears away; "Dinner," he says without predication. His hand flies to cover his mouth, hot, hard breath a veritable gale.

"So," Sirius says conversationally, when an awkward enough silence has fallen, "you're thinking of shagging my cousin."

Remus' eyes turn down as he chops. "Nymphadora?"

"You're thinking of shagging my other cousins, too?" The humor is forced. "I suppose Bellatrix—"

"Stop it."

Sirius is staring at Remus' back.

"I'm not thinking of shagging Nymphadora," he finally says, with some composure. "Nor any of your other cousins."

"Because if you were, Tonks would be the best—"

"Sirius."

"I suppose you're right. She is rather too young for you—"

"—And rather too female—"

"And you wouldn't want to be accused of—"

"_Don't_ say it, Sirius!"

"—Nymphomania." Sirius-Then is back, face split in an incorrigible grin.

The onions are abandoned, and there is a moment—a long, hard moment—of exhalation before the release. Remus leans his laughing head into Sirius' chest and Sirius' long, thin fingers are working their way through his hair before his nose is buried in it. This is a dog-like kiss, a Sirius-Then kiss.

"We're actually going to do it this time, then?" Remus whispers.

A low, rumbling laughter shakes in Sirius' chest. "We're older and wiser, aren't we?"

Remus kisses his cheek. "Yes."

"And I missed you."

"Yes."

"And you're really not thinking of shagging Tonks?"

Remus purses his lips. "Really, really not."

Sirius smiles. "Then we're actually going to do it this time."

And they—

* * *

Author's note: I love Remus/Sirius. Exorbitantly. Hope you all enjoyed this. Please feel free to review. All standard disclaimers apply. 


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